I am trying to remember when it all began. When did I receive my first question about staying at home or going back to work? As I think back to each milestone: maternity leave, pregnancy, wedding I think that it actually precedes all of these. I was probably first asked before I even finished college. Granted it was one of those late night conversations with the roommates about who was going to get married first and how many kids we would have but it was my first foray into the eternal discussion about staying at home versus working.
It didn't start to become clear to me until I got pregnant. That is when the reality set in that I was going to have a baby and suddenly had absolutely no idea how to take care of one. That is also when I realized that in this stage of our lives we are in no position to do it on one income. Pride causes me to sugar coat it and say that I love my job and that my son loves daycare (both of which are true) but the cold hard fact is that we would be homeless and hungry if I didn't bring in a paycheck too. Not to mention the fact that if I weren't busy earning money four days a week you could be damn sure that I would be busy spending it! I do enough damage in the evenings and weekends as it is.
Since I do have to work I have come to insist on a few comforts. I don't want to hear any crap from my husband when I spend money. Yes, all jeans these days DO cost $150. And I definitely NEEDED a new pair of shoes. I do my part by shopping the sale racks which, by the way, does constitute an emergency and I am therefore allowed to use the credit card. We have also recently hired someone to clean the house - I think that I have died and gone to heaven.
Would I give any of these things up to stay at home with my son? I don't know. My schedule is working out for our family and man do I love those three days at home with him!
